Free Jacksonville, FL

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Jacksonville, Florida or as it's commonly known to those of us who don't care for the damned place Jackassville, Floriduh is a city that is one of the meanest god-damned places for those on the streets that one will ever see in the Bushita/CorpGov Empire. This place has one of the highest crime and murder rates in the state of Florida and has one of the largest gaps in between the haves and have nots. Just be wary if on the streets here. Four years ago they locked all the homeless up in an old abandoned school during the Super Dumbass Football Bowl that was hosted here. They are known to do stupid ass shit like this anytime any major event is going on in town so it's advised to keep a low low profile if on the streets here. On the east side at the beach are the millionaires with their trophy wives and McMansions. On the west side is the working class and middle class neighborhoods and on the South side is the yuppies section. To the North are the mean gang-infested streets of the Afro-american communities. This is the area of the highest crime and toughest areas of town. All of this said Jackassville can still be a good place to begin being free from the rat race and to conduct your revolution. It has the cruise terminals at Blount Island and excellent camping areas out on the North Jetties and in the Timucana National Park. Also throughout the city there are opportunities for free food, clothes, and other cool things. The best alternative paper in the area is Folio Weekly but it sometimes swings between being a yuppie rag and a yippie masterpiece. That said though they do provide valuable info like where to find the latest Food not Bombs meetings and such.

Housing[edit]

Your best bet for free housing here is downtown where all of the old abandoned buildings are. The only problem here is that this is the area frequented by the homeless who are mentally challenged poor souls who have lost all sense of themselves. Most of the homeless shelters are down here but they leave much to be desired. It was from the shelters that back in 2004 and 2005 and every year they get the names and locations of homeless brothers in our struggle and round their asses up and lock them in the old abandoned school houses in the downtown area that have no plumbing, heating or A/C. They did this shit in the middle of winter of 2005 when the Super Dumbass Bowl came to town. Also they do this each year at the beach and downtown when they have events such as the Gator Bowl and the Player's Championship Golf Tournament. As a result of this shit and the crime that is rampant down here and it proves not to be the best area to camp out or squat. You're much better off searching the west, south or east sides for places to squat or find free rent. One option is to check with the local real estate companies and pose as a person looking for a rental. Dress professionally when you go to talk to them. Many of them have had a policy for many years of letting you leave a small security deposit or driver's license number and contact information and then giving you the keys to a house that you're interested in looking at and letting you have them for a day or two. One who is smart and savvy might be able to pull several days to a few months free rent by hitting up a few of these companies and getting their keys to several houses and then low impact camping at those houses.

Be prepared though to have a car or motorbike to get around Jackassville as the public transportation here sucks ass and is commonly called the pubic transportation system because it runs for shit. Downtown is easy to get around on the sky train but buses that run on an hourly basis are the only other way to get around.

Another area to look at for housing if you're interested in camping out or squatting and building a small cabin in a remote area is to look to the immediate south of the city in the Guana-Tolomato-Matanzas National Estuary Reserve or to the North at the Jetties around Sister's Creek and Blount Island or around Hugenot Park off of Hecksher Drive. Also several small unoccupied or abandoned islands are in the middle of the bayous, Intra Coastal Waterway and St. John's River that could be put to use for areas to provide shelter. Many could find work in different areas of town and commute by a small boat from work to their island hideaway on the river or ICW.

It is the advice of this author to avoid if at all possible the north side of the town in between the west bank of the river, Highway 17, and Interstate 10 as this is the oldest and poorest area of the city and is overrun with Afro-American gangs such as the East Coast Bloods and Crypts and other gangs that are constantly shooting it out with each other in open warfare in this area. Babies have been found shot dead several times in the last few years in the crossfire between these dumbshits in this area of town. Also if you're into drugs this is the area to find them. If you're not then steer clear of this zone.

One area of the city where someone can find cool people is in the area around Jacksonville University in the Arlington neighborhood and in the 5 points area of Riverside. Here you can find yippies that will mostly be into the legal drugs and pot but not the hard ass shit like crack, crank, ex, meth and the like. Also you'll find a lot of free cultural and entertainment options in these areas and through the University of North Florida out at the Beach and the Florida Community College at Jacksonville. These two colleges put together free theatre performances, free culinary dinners, and other free things like that.

If you can do really low profile, the beaches at Jacksonville Beach, Neptune Beach, and Atlantic Beach provide some opportunities for cool waterfront camping and have an awesome nightlife. Now also though St. Augustine to the south of Jackassville provides an awesome nightlife, yippie culture with art in the parks all week long and a cool hostel called the Pirate Haus Inn. Pirate Haus is cool in that it's cheap at about $15 a night to stay there and there are several places in the St. Augustine area that one could camp if interested in not staying at Pirate Haus. It's an easy to walk or bike town and plenty of work can be had in the tourist industry that thrives here. One advantage of Pirate Haus is that they offer a free pancake breakfast that you can cook all you can eat if you stay there. Also if you have a boat to live on this has an excellent anchorage as does Jackassville along the ICW and the St. John's River.

Fernandina Beach is a small yuppie beach community to the north of Jackassville that provides some of the advantages of St. Augustine but be prepared here to deal with retired baby busters and other yuppie folks such as retired snowchicken yankees. It's not quite the bohemian and artistic community that St. Augustine and the areas of San Marco and Riverside are in Jackassville. But it has some free areas such as Ft. Clinch State Park and Big and Little Talbot Island State Beaches that a resourceful yippie could use to camp in.

Food[edit]

For free food check with some of the African Methodist Episcopal churches in town as most of them have food banks. Also the Mormons are strong here and will provide some free food. Now that said some of your best options for cheap food are the Save a Lot grocery stores that are around. The other cheap places to check are Carroll's Butcher Shops which have a few locations in the Jackassville are for cheap meat. Also check out the Merita Bakery Stores for cheap bread. Here is a good city though due to the corporate income tax structure in Florida to run a food scam posing as a minister of a church as the city has a strong influence by the large superchurch First Baptist throughout it and many places will give church groups free food for the tax write-off.

Other places to check for free food are the condiment bars at Panera Bread, Joe Mugg's Cafe, Barnes and Nobles, Starbucks, Target Snack Bar, Cici's Pizza, Publix Grocery Deli, Winn Dixie Grocery Deli, Walmart Supercenter Deli, and Moe's Southwest Grill. These are located on 103rd St., Atlantic Blvd., Roosevelt Blvd., Beach Blvd., all of the malls and 3rd St. on the beach. All of them provide some kind of condiments that can be put to use to put together cheap free chow. Also Sam's Club, Publix, Target, and B.J.'s Discount Club offer extensive free food samples early in the mornings and early on the weekends. Here are some places to get things like some meat, veggies, and cheese and maybe a few other good surprises for tasty meals. Also check the hotels out in the Orange Park area and in the Mandarin and Beaches areas for good continental breakfast buffets that include such goodies as bacon, sausage, and eggs and other things that one could get and craft together for some good eats.

The two best restaurants that seem easy to scam for free meals but don't over do it or you'll ruin a good thing are Ruby Tuesday's and Cracker Barrel. Both have a policy that if you find food with hair in it they'll give it to you free. Also it's easy to go in at a busy time of day and sneak out without paying at these two. It's not that easy at other places.

Also if you're a survivalist type and can live off of the land there are plenty of good edible plants to be found growing in the ditches, streams, and other areas like behind buildings throughout the city that can provide some good wild veggies for your plate.

Medical Care[edit]

Volunteers in Medicine downtown provides some free or cheap medical help as do the Sulzbacher Homeless Center and the Salvation Army. Also the hospitals here have a policy that they must provide help through the emergency rooms to all comers. Also the Duval County Health Department at Shand's Hospital provides some cheap and free medical care. In addition to this there is a vibrant Chinese and alternative natural medical community in the area that some yippies in the 5 points area can put you in touch with for some medical help.

Planned Parenthood is over on Beach Blvd. and they can provide some valuable medical help.

Legal Aid[edit]

Here for legal help there isn't much free in Jackassville. Check with Eddie Farah and on the web at [forthepeople.com For The People] and with the local ACLU chapter and the local Legal Aid chapter as well as the NAACP, Teamsters, and Seamen's Unions as well as the Southern National Poverty Center chapter for some free legal help. All of them are in the yellow pages and it's a good idea to call them for help. Otherwise you might end up with a public defrauder defending your ass in court and in Jackassville and most of Floriduh they suck.

Armed Forces/Deployment Avoidance Counseling[edit]

Here for help for those trying to avoid the great new quagmire of quicksand that has become the war in the far flung imperial provinces of Afghanistan and Iraq there's not much help if anything with 3 major military installations here it might be a bad area to try hiding due to the strong military ties in Jackassville. However if you should find yourself here trying to avoid being the latest statistic of cannon fodder in this imperial bullshit then check with the local Libertarian Party chapter, and the ACLU. Rumor has it that both are helping people to avoid deployment to the sandbox. Check out the Libertarian Party at LP.org and look up the ACLU in the yellow pages or on switchboard.com.

Play[edit]

Free play can be found at the Maritime Museum everyday, and the Beaches everyday. For art buffs check out Cummer Museum of Art on Tuesday nights. Also the Southern Heritage Museum has a cool little free Civil War museum. Check the Folio Weekly for other free play in the area. Also check with Jacksonville Parks and Recreation for info on Parks and such.

Information[edit]

Check the Florida Times Union for newspaper if you're looking for some news but it's a bit of a yuppie and rich ass snowchicken yankee rag.

The best news is found in the Folio Weekly and in the Latino newspapers if you can read Spanish such as Hola, Eco Latino, and Jax Latino Revista. You'll find all of these for free throughout the city.

T.V. and radio news is best found at WJCT which is the NPR affiliate at 89.9 on the FM and on Channel 7 on TV and channel 8 on cable.

Public Transit[edit]

Jacksonville Transit Authority handles the sky train downtown and all buses throughout the city. Find them online at JTA.com. There is also a ferry that runs across the river on A1A at the beach that is fairly economical to ride on. Otherwise there's not much on public transit in Jackassville.

Free Clothing and Furniture[edit]

For free clothes and furniture check with the Salvation Army Super Thrift Store on Beach Blvd. The author got a free pair of Nautica boat shoes there recently. Also check the yards of the millionaire and upper class and upper middle class yuppie bastards on Sunday nights at Ponte Vedra, the Beaches, Southside, and Mandarin areas. These shitheads throw out awesome and really cool and good shit all the time trying to keep up with the Joneses and also check the colleges in December and May. Craigslist.com runs a good free section here in Jackassville on their site. So there are a few options for you to check out.